2004-01-26 | 13 CONVERSATIONS ABOUT NONE THING

Narrowmindedness is sweeping the nation.

At work tonight I was talking to a gay guy about some other guy about whether or not the other guy might be gay. He said he didn't think so because over the years he's gotten pretty good at figuring that sort of thing out. He said sometimes when he finds out someone is gay or not gay he is surprised, but for the most part he can tell. I then asked as a joke, because he knows I have a girlfriend because she works in the same resort, "what about me?"...and he said "hmmmm...no." I said "damn!" Then these two guys in my department started looking at me funny, and asking why I said "damn?". I told them this story about a guy I used to work with who was gay and who liked another male co-worker, but didn't like me. I explained to them eloquently and extensively that if a gay guy doesn't think you're attractive, you still feel unappreciated to a very minor extent because it's another person, and every persons opinion matters. I then used the opposite example that if a girl you were not attracted to thought that you were the bees knees, it would still be flattering. Therefore, a gay guy is equal to a girl you would never date, so if they think you're attractive, it's flattering, and if they don't think you're attractive, you kinda wonder why, just like when anyone doesn't like you. Most people you meet are just neutral. They don't think about it. But if someone has clearly stated that they do or don't like you like that, you feel it either negatively or positively.

After I explained it to them in a much more understandable way then I just typed it, I still got blind stares and blank looks into outer space.

It's very hard teaching completely ignorant people, but it's more painful when you're trying to explain something simple to someone who's for the most part highly intelligent, but this one little sad portion of their life is filled with the inability to understand homosexuality at any level. I mean I hang out with some of these people. I am enamored by certain parts of their personality, but they are young, and they think they know it all sometimes, and they're so detatched emotionally on certain levels, and it makes it hard to have just a conversation with them, because they think you're trying to preach, or teach, or enlighten them or tell them what to do, which I may be doing on small levels, but mostly I just want them to see my points of view, and it hurts when they can't even accept that much. I feel a lot more respected than I have in a couple years, but I care too much, and if I can't make everyone happy with what I say all the time, then I start sulking and I get quiet, and I don't want to talk to them anymore. Then they come talk to me about something silly, and I'm all about silliness most of the time, so I'm forced to answer. But I just wonder why they act like they don't want to hear it, but they keep coming back for more.

One day I'll be a rock star, then everyone will listen to me when I talk, even when I'm just speaking nonsense. Then some people won't like everyone liking me, so they'll start a group of people who hate listening to me babble, then I'll die, and everyone will cry, but some people will get annoyed with all the crying and start hating me again. Then it will get too popular to hate me, because everytime someone says I suck in a chat room, everyone else agrees because they don't want to get beat up, so all the people who originally hated me start liking me, because I'm not as popular anymore. It's a neverending cycle.

And extremely annoying.

Not unlike this entry.

See? I can't even talk without irritating myself sometimes.

Maybe I should just stop.

- premature ejaculation | tantra +