2002-09-18 | ONLY KILLED WITH LIQUID SORTS

slow and painful

wire hangers on the stove

super slow motion insertion

heal my internal conscience

plastic will melt

like my heart

when you pelt

me with your agonizing art

poking my eyes with invisible darts

murderous looks premeditated with smarts

the dirty looks you give me are sharp

and your wit is abrasive like tree bark

you have poisonous thoughts

and it spreads like plagues

the last time that we fought

i wound up between your legs

it's not what they think

you had me in a tight spot

i slit my wrists in the sink

but the gates of hell were locked

they made me come back and face the truth

i already knew that i invented you

i wish that i hadn't invested in you

and i wish that i hadn't digested you

i don't know what to do with the rest of you

of confusion my mind used to be destitute

i used to think so clear

and saw things without boundaries

now i'm too familiar with fear

and it can now be found inside of me

if i took what i learned and tried to burn it

maybe i'd come out burnt, too

i'd hate to find out the hard way

but that's how i learned to do things with you

you shot me in the arm with your wisdom

and i came out wounded for life

you made me a slave to your kingdom

and christened me with your dullest knife

they warned me not to try you at home

but i didn't want to lose you before i knew

i would've turned you down if i had known

but i was already so attached to you

the mid 90's were hard

i learned so much

then i pulled your card

and i burned so much

third degree hurt

five alarm hate

you looked so good in a skirt

you were my perfect mate

the passion was there

when you were focused on me

that's the flaw in the err

don't name your contacts as the reason you couldn't see

i was so high on your memory

even though i was so low

i didn't see you as an enemy

'cos all of the good that was known

i know deep inside you

that you cared about me

i wanted to ride you

but you were still trying to live independently

when i was finally gone

you acknowledged my existence

but all the confusion i fell upon

was based on more then just distance

you didn't give me enough of yourself

and you didn't trust me at the right times

you knew i was better for your health

but you made me feel like wanting to rescue you was a crime

you tried to be so tough

and i tried to give you enough

i wanted to see you become what you deserve

maybe i shouldn't have been so reserved

i should've screamed at the top of my lungs

until you came around

maybe if you found me after being hung

your reaction would make me feel unbound

but you missed all your chances

i tried to give you the best

i'll always remember our dances

and unfortunately all the tests

you told me to give it a rest

everytime i told you that things were a mess

in truth, i tried to make the best

out of what you gave me with your body language

and you still left me lying there in naked anguish

still agonizing over what could've been

even though with you i could never win

i was so sweet to you, and that was a flaw

in the end, my good deeds did no good at all

i was left looking like a jerk

setting into the pavement, and looking for work

hoping i would dry up and stay

before you made me walk away

spending all my money, to try and give you more comfort

you thought it was funny, i knew i was done for

having to ride the bus with my luggage

walking for miles, discarded like post modern rubbish

i didn't cry this time

i was more angry then sad

you had a destructive mind

and i had just been had

if you wanted someone else, you shouldn't have used me

because your hormonal reaction was so fucking confusing

you looked at me like you hated me sometimes

as if i had something to gain from trying to make you mine

did you think i had a hidden agenda

did you know that i was the one person in your life who wasn't a pretender?

did you know all i wanted was to love you tender?

but all i got was some envelopes marked return to sender

did you think i was waiting for a moment to trick you

or were you tricking me, and i was just some foolish dick to you

was your fiancee lying, because he knew i was more of a man?

was that you on the tape or was it the fear of him raising his hand?

did you want my money?

i didn't have that much

was there more to it then that?

did you really miss my touch?

did you really have my pictures on the wall

to do what you do you've got to have brass balls

a plan that strategic would be applauded by me

if i wasn't the victim, tell me why i should be

or at least why i feel like you destroyed part of my being

are you sitting there laughing at me wondering what it all means

do you even think of me

or do you selectively block me out

i think you're afraid of what i did to you

don't be ashamed that i found you out

unfortunately it's too late for you to change your mind

i finally stumbled upon what i always hoped i would find

i found someone like you, who i love with my everything

and she accepts me naturally, without anyone saying a thing

you should be ashamed

because it's so easy to live this way

you're so lame

you won't even admit this song is directed your way

- premature ejaculation | tantra +