2004-02-29 | ECNALUMBA

You ever notice that sometimes when people offer to buy you lunch at the last minute, you act surprised, and you say "no, please don't" even though you were secretly hoping they would pay all along? Sometimes the only reason you agree to go to lunch with them is because you think there's a good chance they might pay. It's not like I want everybody to buy me lunch, but there are certain people who I'd rather not go to lunch with at all, so I need an incentive. Usually it's like a friends mother, or a long lost uncle. Deadbeat dads. People like that. Uncomfortable silences can sometimes be overshadowed by a free sammich.

The Sage Francis concert was cancelled. The sign said he was sick. Bummer, dude.

The other day I was driving behind an ambulance, and I had a mental vision of an animated corpse, not unlike the one's that were dancing in the Thriller video, jumping out of the back of the ambulance and onto the hood of my car. Then the next day I was driving behind a truck that had a horse trailer attached to it, and I had a mental vision of a horse falling out of the back and trying to keep his balance, and me trying to swerve around him. And of a moonwalking corpse fondling children. Okay. That last part was a lie. And gross. I apologize.

They need to make late night black and white on the game show network an all night thing, just for insomniacs like me. 2 shows is not enough.

I went to the university of arizona basketball game today. It was a good time. It's cool to see the beginning stages of a team that could easily be a champion someday soon. There's a lot of young, scary talent on that team.

I thought I was the only one who thought of a joke like this, but Bill Scheft, a writer for Letterman had a joke just like it a couple days after I thought about it. But here it is anyway, for the one or two people who might get it: I think this throwback jersey fad is getting out of control. I went to Mitchell & Ness' online store today and they were trying to sell a Rasheed Wallace Atlanta Hawks throwback jersey.

- premature ejaculation | tantra +