2003-10-09 | ONE

I haven't had much to write about lately, so my last 4 or 5 entries are songs.

Remember, you can read all of my songs/poems here:

"LOOKING OUT FOR NUMBER ONE"

you must've thought it was pretty funny
watching me bend over backwards for you
everybody acted like there was something wrong with me for believing that there was something right with you
but they weren't there for the bitter or the sweet
they've never worn my shoes, but they pretend to know what it's like walking on these feet
i know there was something of substance there, even though it always felt like it was up in the air
it's okay, because i've moved on to better and more stable beings
but sometimes i still think about how good it could've been
(and sometimes was)
you'll always remember and love your first
because they inflate you with so much pride before they contribute to your burst
you'll always remember number one
because it was so much fun before you wanted to pick up the gun
you must've thought it was pretty neat
to have someone to beat down and someone to kiss your feet
don't know if i was used or manipulated
much of what happened has faded
maybe i didn't know all about love
but you sure had one messed up vision of it
i think you loved me so much that you couldn't admit it
it was too bizzare for you to have something normal
too scary for you to have something safe
too evil for you to have something sacred
i'm surprised you let me see you naked
you had so much to hide and nothing to put on the line
nothing to lose, yet you couldn't let your ego be stroked, let alone bruised
but you'd take the opportunity to make me feel like less of a man for providing you with a better one, and a better plan

- premature ejaculation | tantra +