2002-12-26 | SEXY BEE STORY

Just because I'm listening to Pinkerton doesn't mean I'm "emo".

Who said that album was "emo" anyway?

Did the emo president get a bill passed that said this was the album that all Emoricans would site as their bible? Or is that reserved for "The Places You Have Come to Fear the Most"?

To change the subject completely, I was once in the school spelling bee. I didn't study the book at all. I just played the guessing game.

I made it to like the semifinals, but lost on some word I never heard before. Some of the other kids in the spelling bee claimed I got the word before that wrong, but the judges didn't notice. I think they were just jealous because my shiznicks were tight.

The girl that won the school spelling bee went on to win the entire state spelling bee, so I didn't mind losing to her. She got to go to Washington D.C.

I used to pretend to not like her because she was the smart girl, and it wasn't cool in my hometown to like the smart girl. But I had a secret crush on her. Mellissa Ledgerwood. I never did tell her. I never really told any of my secret crushes my true feelings. That's why I never had a date in high school, I guess.

I've never really had a date ever. Not a "date date". Whatever that means. I've always just ended up dating women. I didn't date them first. They just all couldn't help but fall victim to my irresistable charm.

Shit... "I got more property then Monopoly"

I have a picture of Jared from Subway in my wallet.

It's just a joke.

But I'm kind of "portly", so people see it sometimes, and they think it's there to like inspire me or something. I have a strange sense of humor. I always keep strange pictures in my wallet. Right now I have an Elvis Presley drivers license in there.

I also thought about buying a Hello Kitty cd player the other day. Partly because my girlfriend loves Hello Kitty stuff, but partly just to be silly.

Christmas dinner at Stephanies parents house went fine.

I liked her brother and sister-in-law a lot more then I thought I would.

We played Trivial pursuit. (the last 20 years one)

It was fun.

I also got to watch most of the University of Hawaii football game. (the Hawaii Bowl)

They lost.

It didn't matter though, because it was my first Christmas with Stephanie, and probably the best I've had so far. I didn't have many down moments during the day. I usually get down during some point on Christmas, but I was pretty happy, consistently, throughout the day.

The one down point was really bad. I snapped at Stephanie unintentionally, and it made her feel upset, and it made me feel so bad. I didn't mean to make her feel like shit. Especially not on Christmas. I still feel bad, although we've patched everything up.

It wasn't a big deal, but like I said before, everytime I make her feel even a little bad it's a big deal to me.

I put myself on the couch because I felt like I would punish myself for being an asshole, and not sleep next to her.

She thought I was doing that to stay away from her or something I think.

I just felt bad. I almost cried. When I see how angry or sad I make her sometimes, it just makes me feel so empty for a few minutes.

She almost got up and left when she saw me on the couch, but I convinced her to stay.

I apologized, and agonized, and I hope she knew I meant it.

We slept peacefully the rest of the night.

We're still so happy together.

It's gonna be fine.

It'll probably be much better then fine.

One thing about love is it makes you feel like you're on vacation all the time.

It's cool having my own place, too. I mean Stephanie practically lives here, too, but that's the way I wanted it. But not living with roommates or parents makes it feel like a vaction, too.

Another thing I feel bad about:

Getting Stephanie sick.

I hope she doesn't get as bad as I did. I've been sick since Monday the 16th.

The last time I got her sick, which was just over a year ago, which was also the first time I met her in person, she was sick for like 3 weeks. I hope it doesn't get like that again.

Life is pretty good.....

Stay tuned.

- premature ejaculation | tantra +