2002-10-01 | WHERE YOU BEEN?

confusion

have all my emotions been leaked?

when i see him will they all come back?

what do i feel?

what do i say?

will it all make sense when the time comes?

confused!!

when he breathes his last breath will i lose mine?

maybe i know too much of what to expect

why is the biological still around

does he deserve it

i don't think so

my first "step" saved me

take away the so-called "real one" and i've still got a dad

take away a step and i'll still have a father

that's all he ever was

he treated me like a son

he had a "real" son too, but he never used those words

we were both of his sons

my sister was his daughter

she didn't always appreciate him

but i think she knows how great he was now

am i drained because of the initial bad news

when they said cancer all i heard was "death"

simultaneous blows to the heart

i had never been heart broken in 19 years of living

then twice in one week

first Tiffany, then my dad

i broke down

i should've been stronger

it must've been depressing to see me in my state

my dad was gracious with the disease

he blamed no one

i had to give him space, although i resented them for putting it that way

he had to live life on his terms for awhile, even though, tragically and ironically, he was unable to fulfill so much

that's why it's time for me to go

we never wanted it to come to this

but now that it has

there is no way it can go on

- premature ejaculation | tantra +