2002-12-21 | SLASH FORE(arms) TEST-EMO-NIALS (a bad play on words)

When I search the recently updated diaries, I always go to the profile first, and if it sucks, I don't go anywhere near your diary.

Keep that in mind before you leave a lame profile.

Then there are the people that still have no profile.

One guys diary is named "softbulletin", so I'm assuming he loves the flaming lips, and has great taste in music, yet he has no profile even set up.

What an idiot.

And lost but not least to make you want to kill yourself, is I've read about 30 profiles today that have people putting *sigh* in the middle of sentences.

This is not that cool anymore.

Here and there is not so bad, but some of you have 43 *sigh*'s just in your profile.

I wouldn't touch your diary with a 4,938,176 foot pole.

I need some inspiration folks.

Help me out.

Stephanie inspires me in more ways then I could ever say.....but as far as creative writing goes, I look to other excellent writers to fuel me, and lately y'all have been running on empty like Jackson Browne.

Worse then that, your bad taste in all things, most of all music, makes Jackson Brownes music seem revolutionary. And makes him seem almost cool.

Actually I used to hate him a lot more, but I actually didn't know much about him. One of those stupid unfounded hate thingies that you form for no reason. I've heard more of his songs on classic rock radio lately, besides the obvious (lame) ones, and some of them aren't that bad.

I know....I just contradicted all the people who listed lame bands in their profile.

But no...those people are in a different class of lame.

They're to lame profiles what Liberace was to flamboyantly gay piano players with really shiny outfits.

Except for the fact that I actually enjoyed Liberace.

Then there was this other guy who had a stupid intro to his profile, bad favorite diaries, bad bands listed, bad movies, bad authors, but had one cool thing....he liked Radiohead.

On his "comments" about them he had the nerve to put something like "they're music is like poetic..blah blah blah.. i'm a tool... (this next part is exactly what he said, word for word) don't pretend to like them if you don't.."

Listen here, MTV boy. If someone who's really into the crap that you like also enjoys Thom Yorke and company, then they're music must not be that commercially inaccessible.

I mean, I like Radiohead....I love them. But not because they're weird, or spacey, or one of a kind, or whatever you think they are. I just happen to like them. I like some bands, and I hate others.

You also like Radiohead.

But you're boring.

God, I really sound mean. But I'm not. It was just that he was telling people not to be lame, but he's like.... unrad...or goodless... I'm trying to use a term that doesn't offend anybody, but still states what he came off as on his diary.

Anyway...it's too late. Everybody already thinks I'm a jerk right?

It's weird that I'm writing this diary that sounds all angry, but I've actually never been happier then I am right now.

Hey...I wrote a long entry.

You predictable people actually DID inspire me after all.... wow!

It's weird how things you hate inspire you, too. Sometimes even more then the good things in your life.

But nothing will ever do it like.... doing it.

Actually, honestly, true love is a real inspiration, and I'm so lucky to have it. I don't know how it happened.

Sorry sad dweller people of diaryland.

"Happiness sucks, bro. Let's go to 7 Eleven, get a Slurpee, and pretend we're all sad and emo and stuff. That would rule....I mean suck.. I mean.... I don't know how I'm supposed to feel... Oh that's right...I don't care about anything, man."

Fuck-o-meter= only once a day average so far. (I've had the flu for all 3 days since the fuck-o-meter challenge began. Cut me some slack)

Hmmmmm. I just thought of a good name for a band, or movie, or song or something.

Cut me some Slackers.

Emo kids are like the slackers of the early 90's. Except that slackers weren't actually slackers. We were just cool kids that adults were jealous of because we were smart and independent, but liked to go to rock concerts and smoke an occasional blunt.

But emo kids are really slackers. Well maybe they're not. But they pretend to not care, and be lazy, and uninvolved and stuff on purpose.

I can't believe I'm talking about "emo kids" as if they actually exist. There's no such thing as an "emo kid" no matter how many people use it as their screen name or diaryland name.

So that album (it would be the second album, after the first emo-mock titled first album "Emo Therapy", which has an album cover of a kid getting his brain de-emo-tized) "Cut Me Some Slackers", would show a line of "shoegazers" waiting in line to get their "Dashboard Confessional Saves Lives" "tattoos" slashed into their arms by none other then Chris Carabba weilding a "pen" made of a razor blade....

Hmmmmm. That was supposed to be a joke, but...it's just crazy enough.....

- premature ejaculation | tantra +